Saturday, February 16, 2008

Best Weekend Ever?

Note: To be read and cross referenced with Trina's entry.

T-Money came to visit last weekend. This was great for several reasons.

-I got to surprise L by bringing one of her friends to her birthday party
-I didn't have to pay for T's ticket
-L got entertained by someone other than me

All pluses for Sam.

Anyway, my version of events goes something like this:

I was supposed to meet T at the airport. I've been to Logan several times, so I didn't think this was a big deal. Of course, it turns out I've never actually been INSIDE to pick someone up, so I didn't know where the 'Arrivals' showed up. And since I was unable to locate it, I'm fairly certain it doesn't exist. Instead of waiting for T to deplane (stupid word) I wandered like a small lost child, clinging to the hope that by wandering close to the baggage claim area she'd have to find me sooner or later. Which she did. Good thing.

I've had most of the successes in my life because I've relied on other people not to fail. Thanks, world.

Then I was incompetent at trying to find where the silver line picked up outside the terminal (yes, despite being dropped off by the very same bus not 20 minutes earlier), but we managed to find our way back to my workplace, where I promptly abandoned T at the mall (I'll be a great dad some day, no doubt - hey kids, just go play in the large public space for a few hours, I'm gonna grab some 'me' time...) for 4 hours.

Then we got to Salem (approximately 2 hours later than I'd planned, so L was already there) and the surprise was unleashed - still a big success. (side note - dudes: chicks dig surprises, but not dick-in-a-box. write that down). Hooray for everyone. After that, I remembered that I'd neglected another friend who was driving down from Portland, K. K was lost and had called for directions while I was riding home with T. I missed the call, and K had to be led into Salem by following some dude leaving the laundromat where she got directions. She made it to our house, and I hear she only got raped twice. I'll call that a success.

Then we sat around getting drunker for like 2 hours until we decided we were sufficiently obnoxious to go out. Eating, drinking, dancing, yelling commence. L got a birthday dedication from the 84 person band playing that night. It was a very special night for everyone.

Got home, watched some hot girl on girl action, then inflated the air mattress and passed out. Morning, and the mandatory breakfast feast commenced. It started with us squeezing into a 4 person table the size of a postage stamp, bordered closely on two sides by other patrons (who were none too impressed with us; they were bombarded with vulgarity and idiocy for a solid hour, setting aside the drinking straw assault and battery), progressed to me turning into a 9 year old gigglepants at the meal title 'Bald Billy omlette' and subsequently eating my body weight in pancakes and sausage, and ended with me in tears from laughing. At my own joke. Have I mentioned how popular I am?

After that, T and K went to Quincy, and the plan was to meet T and head to IKEA since K was going to stay in Boston that night. Which would have worked fine, if I actually knew where I was going (ongoing theme in my life - lost...hmm, provacative). But I didn't, and L decided she wasn't going to help, so we were a little late (other ongoing theme). This made me a little grumpy, which I'm sure was fun for my delightful guest T. But she's a little ray of sunshine, so she spent quite some time cheering me up. She fell asleep on the return trip, after my circular arguments had exhausted us all. I'm pretty much a black hole of dumb.

Then, a tired (but delicious, and free - thanks T) meal at the brew pub, consumption of 40s while watching L assemble the IKEA chair to round out the night. By the way, if you can get someone else to assemble your furniture, I highly recommend it. Not only do YOU not have to do it, you can criticize someone else. Pretty much win-win.

So for those of you scoring at home, the final tally was:

T- friend score of 87,555,432 out of a possible 10
L-8 on surprised score out of possible 10.
Sam- Lost, late, but full. Still pegged at -29 life score, out of a possible 10. Keep that chin up.


T-Money said...

Oh Mr. Samson-Star, it sounds like someone is having a low self-esteem day. Well, I heart you. AND I had a wonderful time. I was even super depressed for days after coming home cuz I missed you guys soooo much. Total friend score for Samson: infinity out of a possible 10.

Anonymous said...

No, not anonymous (is that really how it is spelled???) Just no spot to sign in appropriately!

T's mom said.......

Sounds like you all had a great weekend. Really enjoyed the two perspectives! Happy birthday L!!!

K said...

How come I don't get a friend score?

Mr. Benner said...

I realize that I am a little late with my comment… however; as an eye-witness to the events that took place, I can confirm that T-Money did indeed have a good weekend. In fact, I believe I overheard the column ask for her number after their unabashed grind-fest.

Sam said...

K's friend score was a ten, like usual, until she took it upon herself to launch a personal attack on the administration of a certain fantasy baseball league.

Now she's a 0.

Mr Benner! So good to see you chime in. I am sad to report that t-money and mr column had a falling out (mr column was a republican or something) and they are no longer speaking. they will always cherish the time they had together.