Saturday, January 17, 2009

fan base

For the most part, there are approximately 4 people who read this regularly. I know this, and appreciate each one of you.

There is, however, some secondary traffic, from passerbys with time on their hands and odd search criteria on their brains. I get these statistics from google analytics (it'll be helpful to have these numbers on hand when negotiating my next contract) and thought I'd share some.

Search terms which brought traffic to the site:

-catwear anus (3 visits, not sure what the first one found that necessitated additional visits)
-computer people crap (2 visits - I'm registered as a crappy computer person)
-AAA memberships and telemarketing (1 visit)
-abf clubbing (1 visit @ 160bpm)
-biopsy for rash (1 visit - I'm not surprised there weren't more)
-dr quackstein (1 visit - no referral fee received)
-drool phlegm (1 visit - and really?)
-eli jaxon bear molestation (1 visit)
-lesbianexplosion (1 visit, 1 amazing word)
-spit phlegm in my face (1 visit, and yes, please)
-www.attractive-abs.com (1 visit - note to self, register domain name)
-somgf (1 visit)
-prison inmates (1 visit)
-hipaa in laymen's terms (1 visit, sic, and I'm pretty sure they didn't find what they were looking for on this site)

The internet is a wonderful place.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

nice work if you can get it

So I'm still waiting for my car to be fixed. I am always interested in what sort of excuse people give, real or imagined, so I was very impressed by this service manager's explanation: Parts are scarce because the warehouses (I am inventing this - I don't know where parts like ignition cylinders come from if it isn't some blacksmith in a tiny shop in Ingolstadt) are allowing their inventories to dwindle due to the economy.

I like the explanation because it sounds really good. Except, the parts that would fall into this category aren't exactly optional. The market doesn't really dry up for these items. I can't start my car because there's no place for the key to go *but* I don't have much money so I'll just skip it. I'm fairly sure people will continue to vandalize and crash into one another's cars despite the state of the union.

My real concern is with my insurance company. And this may be a gross simplification, but here's my take:

I've paid an estimated $8100 in car insurance since I've been driving so that the insurance company will go halfsies on a $950 bill. Thanks, dicks.

I am also confused by the point of a 'deductible'. Isn't the point of insurance that they'll pay for shit I can't pay for? So why do I still need to pay for part of it? Their whole reason for existing is making money, because most people pay more in premiums than they need in claims. But there's a chance that I'll run over a disabled infant holding the Holy Grail in a crosswalk. I am not going to be able to cover that, so in this instance: thanks, insurance.

Is the deductible to discourage me from destroying my car on a bi-weekly basis? Because I'm pretty sure my premium would go up if that was the case. I guess I'm glad other professions don't work on these principles. My doctor did most of my surgery, but will require me to just go ahead and suture my chest cavity myself. Oh hey mailman, thanks for bringing my mail. what's that? i need to go to the post office and pick up the other half? oh. um, ok?

so....very....bitter.