Wednesday, August 8, 2007


Last week marked the return of everyone's favorite backyard friend, Stinky the Skunk. Stinky, not being the brightest, nor the most thoughtful of creatures, done got himself caught in my hav-a-hart trap. That made me hav-a-shit-fit. ha. He also ate my bait, which was not intended for him. Delicious wilted lettuce, wasted.
Hello, friend.

And back to the story. This is the 3rd skunk I've caught in this trap ('Sam,' you ask
, 'why do you continue to set the trap if you know you're going to catch skunks?'. Well, grasshopper, I changed the bait from graham crackers with peanut butter - mostly because I kept eating it - to lettuce to attract groundhogs and not skunks. Unfortunately, some skunks, like some bloggers, are just too damn stupid.) The method I've devised for releasing the skunks is a complex one involving an impermeable barrier (in this case a trash bag), a stick to prop open the door, and legs to propel me far, far away when the skunk makes its exit. The theory being a skunk won't spray in a confined space (hence the trashbag), the hav-a-hart won't stay open without the stick, and I won't smell as nice if I don't run away.

So I try and implement the plan.

Except Stinky won't leave. His ass is hanging halfway out the door, and yet, he will not leave. Perhaps he, too, felt the bond between captor and captive. My own little smelly Stockholm Syndrome example.

Leave, for reals.

As you can surmise from the proximity of the photos, I'm not too worried about Stinky spraying me anymore. I'm more worried he's going to die in that cage and I'll have to figure out what to do with his carcass. So I implement a more aggressive forced egress approach.

Untitled from Sam and Vimeo.

Like you with that video,I eventually lost interest and just left him alone for like a half hour. He left. Also left a nice surprise outside last night. See where kindness to animals gets you? Nowhere.

Oh, if you were wondering, I didn't have any means for transporting Stinky elsewhere instead of letting him back into my yard. If only I had a pickup.

1 comment:

T-Money said...

I was elated to realize these video clips come with audio. I belive my favorite part was when I heard an exasperated Samson say Please leave. Also, what type of beverage is this Raid that you speak of? Can I look forward to a Steel Reserve/Raid taste test entry? Miss you!