New man crush

Ahh, it's official. I can finally declare my purely heterosexual admiration for Daisuke Matsuzaka. The rookie from Japan (a 26 year old rookie, a veteran of 8 years in the Japanese major league, but it's all good come Rookie of the Year time) pitched a splendid debut on Thursday afternoon, defeating the Royals 4-1. As much as I'm in awe of his abilities (apparently he has like 8 pitches, can paint corners with any of them, and could kung fu the shit out of you if you so much as look at him sideways), I think I'm more impressed with the way he comes across in interviews.

And that is, through a translator.

I think all professional athletes should be assigned a translator, and should be required to either a) answer in a foreign language, or b) whisper in their translator's ear. This way, we could train the translators to screen the answers for impropriety, hubris, retardation, and racism. A pipe dream, I know.

Anyway, a photo for those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about.